So today I ask myself where am I? What am I doing here? Is it worthwhile to run after something we ‘think’ we know what and where it is? But the reality is man wants to keep going after one thing or the other. He/she might live under the disbelief that they need to work harder to achieve more. Has there ever been a time when I might have told myself, well enough of trudging or sprinting, let’s slow down and smell the roses. Never!
Goal-oriented as we might label ourselves. At every stage in life we have different goals. As a child you wanted to be the best athlete in your school or be the topper of your class. Some wanted to be a dance performer or a singer when they grew up. With change in time priorities and goals change. What doesn’t change is man’s quest for achieving more! I do not say that is wrong. It is absolutely important as the quest to do better lies at the core of the growth and success of a person.
What I fail to understand is when will this quest ever end? How much more successful do you want to be? I want to be finish school and live upto my parents’ expectations. So I work harder each day and hope I can do better the next day as well. I keep upto speed with all the things going around me, taking care of errands, responsibilities and chores. I also do not fail to take time out for friends and my dear ones. Even if it takes two minutes of my busy schedule to speak to them over the phone or a line of email, I would do that. Yet at the end of the day, there remains a void. What is that I am missing? I come home to an empty house everyday, that which I call “home”. I strive to do better so that I can go home, the real home to my parents and siblings. How justified is this strife to keep running when what matters to you most is far away from you? I look for warmth and love around me. Is there any? Well yes if you are one lucky bum, you have the love and care of your friends. Yet there is a void unfilled!
Every morning I muster all courage within me and start another day. Another run after something known, oh well unknown! Call me a lil thinker. I wouldn’t disagree. Yet my questions remain unanswered. I hope I don’t turn into a philosopher anytime soon!
So I end it on this note –
But I have promises to keep,
And Miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep!
4 comments:
Sweetpea...
I must admit that you are an awesome writer... but this is what I feel.... I know you better coz of that story of ours :-D and of what I know.... you n me we are never happy about anything... we worry way toooo much...
So dear girl....take it easy n chillax
Nice blog.
Its not a quest actually. In a quest, we know what we are looking for.
But we cant help. The tragedy of us humans is that we spend our lives in discomfort in order to get "comfort". But we dont know what this "comfort" is. Even more tragic is that we dont realize when we have it or that we have it.
No I am not talking about a college award or a high profile job or a mercedes here. By "comfort", I mean Satisfaction mingled with internal bliss. It can also be referred to as momentary peace of mind and a heart filled with happiness.
There is a constant mental noise going on in our minds which stalls all our progress towards this comfort. This noise constantly keeps us reminding OF WHAT WE DONT HAVE. This makes us want to run and keep running. If a person runs because of this noise, he or she is bound to get tired in this effort towards infinity.
I'd like to quote Deepak Chopra here - He has said, "Joy is a return to the deep harmony of body, mind and spirit
that was yours at birth and can be yours again. That openness to love, that capacity for wholeness with the world around you, is still within you."
Unfortunately, people view Joy as a reward for achievement. It is this mental noise that keeps telling you "When I have this or that I will be complete." But, we need to remind ourselves, that real "wholeness" or "joy" or "comfort" is a natural spiritual state, which has no dependence on the material world or the outer world. It is this feeling that we are subconsciously and unknowingly striving for , hoping to find it some day.
True joy comes in those moments where our soul experiences itself as worthy of dignity and love just as it is, without any alterations.
We need to learn something from a child. When the child hugs its parent, it digs its head in the parent's lap and feels the warmth of love. The child feels comfort and satisfaction, and so does the parent. This is a moment of joy.Another example of joy is when soulmates hold each other's hands. There is nothing to talk about - they are just being with each other. This feeling is the feeling of wholeness. There can be many such moments of true joy in life- it is those moments that we should really strive for;
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